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One Month and Counting

It has officially been one month since we have left the church (not the Church). Our last day of work was Christmas Eve, but we were paid through the end of December through vacation and comp time. This season of rest has been incredible. My life as a Christian has been like a really long race. I kept running and running and running and running. Then, I hit The Wall. At The Wall, my ministry adrenaline kicked in, the point in the race that your legs feel like jello and your eyes get so blurry that you can't see peripherally. As if that wasn't enough, the last whole stretch of the race had been uphill, getting steeper and steeper. Finally, the Coach steps in and says, "That'll do, pig," (name the family movie reference) and takes you out of that race.

The problem is, the Church tells you that you are a runner. This is true. But the misunderstanding is that the Church says you've got to run constantly. Not only do you have to run constantly, but you have to run faster and faster and steeper and steeper. This misunderstanding stems from the racers teaching themselves. If the only thing that you know about running is what you are learning from the person running in front of you, then you will keep running just fast enough to keep up with that person until one of you simply can't go on.

Misconception 1: You have to run faster and faster and steeper and steeper.
Correction: You should be a better runner now than you were in the past. The misconception here is that "faster" and "steeper" are equated with "better" by the Church. [The better Christian you are, the more you are doing to serve the church. A step up from this is that you have a larger sphere of influence. Neither necessarily mean "better."] At some point in the race, it may be better to run slower. At some point, it may be better to run downhill. But if all you know about running is what you see around you, you will either just be following someone else's idea of running, which usually means running faster and steeper, or your pride steps in and says, "I'm a better runner than him, therefore I need to run faster and steeper to prove it to me/him/God." However, if you are listening for the Coach to tell you how to run, you will realize that He has a clearer understanding of what a "better" runner is.

Misconception 2: You have to run constantly or you're not a runner. (By definition, a runner is one who runs. If you're not running, then you are not a runner.)
Correction: A runner is someone whose purpose is to run, no matter how much time they actually run. A toaster is a machine that toasts my bread, even though it is not constantly toasting my bread. Even if the toaster never toasts my bread, it is still a toaster. As anyone who has run a race can tell you, it is better to practice multiple times with breaks in between before the race. Your body doesn't build muscle during a workout but during the rest in between workouts. [Plants are the same way; they grow more when it is dark than when it is light because they are use the light energy differently during the light than after the light.] And, unless you are going incredibly slow in your race, it is impossible to gain more energy than you are using, especially over a long period of time.

The key is: the Coach knows what you need to do to be a better runner. He knows how you need to improve and will put you through tough workouts to do so. He knows your potential as a runner and he will push you to be that runner. He knows that you need to rest and not just run. And the best thing is, he was a runner himself. He ran his race the best it could be done, and now he's helping you to do the same. All you have to do is humbly listen for the Coach's instructions and put them into action.


[Sorry for any inconsistency in my analogy, since I wrote this in one sitting. Also, sorry for any ambiguity in my use of "better" since I realize it probably didn't actually add any clarity.]


P.S. Please pray for us to have perseverance in our faith through this time.

Schultze Gets The Blues

The whole movie, I thought he was incredibly cute. But now that the movie is done, there is this huge lonely feeling that invades your life. And no matter how much I try, I can't remember the main song. All I can hear is the bridge of the Chicken Dance. AHHH!

P.S. Why has no one responded to all of my blogs for the last two weeks?

To everything, there is a season . . .

And the 5th season of Gilmore Girls lasted one week. I never expected Lane to get pregnant, but this show always keeps me on my toes.

I also read an entire book in one week. Well, it is a book that is just an excerpt of another book. I read The Call To Discipleship out of Karl Barth's Church Dogmatics. I'm not sure I fully agree on his definition of Christian obedience, but I enjoyed his critiques of Christian religiosity. For example, if we simply do what we see other disciples doing, then we are not actually being disciples of Jesus like them; we are just disciples of those people.

Now, I'm reading Hip-Hop Generation by Bakari Kitwana, the editor of The Source magazine. It has been a while since I've surrounded myself with these cultural issues, but, in an ironic way, it is refreshing especially living in Mainly-rural Town, Minnesota.

I've recently thought about starting a book club with people nearby that I know. For anyone who has known me longer than 3 years or so will realize that this is extremely odd for me to say. I just miss being able to talk with a group of people about anything intellectual in any kind of structured manner since college. Again, being an adult is stupid.

"Dance Dance" Revolution

DANCE, DANCE
(Kate Hurley, Michelle Patterson)
 
 
Lord, I cried out, I cried out to You
You answered me in Your mercy 
You’re anger was fleeting
And now I will dance in your favor all my life
 
Let my heart sing for you
And not … remain silent
Let my heart sing for you
Turn my weeping into a dance
 
So dance, dance my soul
There’s no reason for you to weep
So dance, dance my soul,
Make music to your King.


[When God tells you he is going to do something, everything goes the opposite direction for a while. Then, praise God, it goes exactly the direction he said it was going to go. Hallelujah and Amen!]

Move Over Sudoku

Ever since the first time I saw Sudoku books having their own stands at book stores, I have been frustrated. Sudoku is just a Japanese-named version of "Number Place" from Dell Magazines (or the other way around; either way, it only became popular once it had a catchy foreign name). I always wondered why "CrossSums" never became popular. They are the same idea, except they aren't in equilateral, symmetrical shapes nor does it use all nine digits in each row or column. Therefore, it is much more difficult and therefore more fun. Then, I saw it. KAKURO! Kakuro is the Japanese name for CrossSums. The only thing I could find before Kakuro was the little toilet-shaped books that have miniaturized CrossSums, and those just looked too easy.

So, for all of you seduced by Sudoku, try Kakuro, its/it's superior.

Best Book EVER, Scariest Looking Animal EVER, and My Largest Leap Of Faith EVER

Best Book EVER:
Okay, maybe it's not the best book ever, but it has been incredibly important to my spiritual formation for the last four months. And now, I finally finished it. Of course, I think most books that I finish are good books. Well, if I think it isn't good, I won't finish it. Anyways, what is this great book? The book is "A Divine Confrontation" by Graham Cooke. Graham Cooke in general has been our spiritual meat for the last 10 months or so anyways, but mainly in a CD-sermon context. Then we moved onto devotional journals by Graham and now I finished the big book. It is the first 300+ pages book I've read all the way through probably since smaller-paged, larger-fonted books in high school. I would recommend ANYTHING by Graham Cooke. It has taken our spiritual lives dimensions past where we were just one year ago.

Scariest Looking Animal EVER:
There is a picture of a one-eyed, no-nosed kitten that was born in Oregon. For the one day of its existence, this animal was the scariest looking animal ever. Or at least scariest looking kitten ever. I guess a non-deformed giant milipede is scarier, but for being a non-Serengeti kitten, this looks scary.

Largest Leap Of Faith EVER:
Katy and I "recently" left our jobs at a church. We knew through many people and some prophetic words that God was calling us out of that ministry. Everything was then reaffirmed as things played out. God even revealed the day on which we were to get the ball rolling. Then, nothing. Well, not nothing, just all quiet on the spiritual front. But when you go from basic Christian existence to divine revelation, basic Christian existence seems to be just that: basic. During the time of revelation, we felt so close to God and his moving, but felt so unsure of everything the second we weren't in a time of revelation. Looking back, it is easier to see that we were relying upon our own knowledge of what God was doing moreso than on God himself. It is not that we hadn't had times of revelation before; ever since we began listening to Graham Cooke CDs we have been more open to the working of prophecy in his disciples and have therefore been more exposed to prophetic words. One of the things we learned about in those CDs was that God will give the prophetic word before appearances go the opposite direction.
So, that leads us to Christmas Eve, our last night at the church. We then spent a week and a half during the holidays with our families out of state. We have now been back for almost another week. God has provided everything we have needed, especially since the point that we stopped "providing" for ourselves.
Where does that leave us? We have no job, and therefore no way of providing for ourselves. And instead of proactively seeking jobs, God has called us to seek him. that is the HUGE leap of faith. But, looking at our situation and how God has provided for us for the last couple of months in obvious ways, we are in no position to question him. Normally, the worldly side of me would look at our situation and say, "I just need to find a way to bring in any money I can right now (within reason; i.e. not prostitution, drugs, or fast-food restaurants)." However, I am at peace right now. More than I was when I had an income. I know that God will direct us when it is time; God will provide until that point; God will provide after that point. The tough question is, how much am I supposed to be surrounding myself with job opportunities before God will point one out and how much am I supposed to just wait for God to direct us to it? But I try to not get bogged down with questions like that and try to remember to find rest in God and to seek God more than any earthly thing, especially a job.

After all that, please pray for Katy and I as we seek the Lord. Pray that we will have the faith and the patience that God is calling us to have in this time of transition between seasons in our life.